I hit 60 next month. Looking back at my 40s it was definitely a time of flux, but also of reflection: what I'd done and what I wanted to do. I can't say many of those plans came true. I planned to stay in this house until I couldn't get up the stairs, but we're being evicted in a few weeks. I planned to get back into work and kick M.E. So much for that!
What I can say, is that despite everything, I am happier and more relaxed than I have ever been. I still enjoy the thrashiest music, laughing my head off at crap TV, playing the PS4 and hanging out with my mates. I spoke to my Dad the other day, he's 91, and he says you don't really change the way you feel inside from about 40 onwards. The shell just ages. You look in the mirror and wonder who the old git is on the other side! He genuinely still gets out of bed excited about the day ahead, despite my Mum passing a while back.
I mean there are changes - your kids grow up and leave home, your teeth get a bit iffy and it's time to reach for the reading glasses more frequently, but inside, where it really matters you stay, to all intents and purposes, the same person.
Love your work, man. Always thought provoking. Enjoy the next 8 years. It'll be a blast!
I love this piece. So much of what you said about the different groups of 8 are really quite true. I'll be turning 56 in September. Within weeks I'll be moving and not sure where or even if I'll still be with my partner. And guess what he's been in my life for the last 8 years. See that 8 year grouping really does a repeat. I read your newsletter every time it appears in my email. So if it's not every week I'll just wait till it's in there again.
And I think you’ve got it right - for the most part and for most people, things get better as you get older. I’m in my late 40s and happier than I’ve ever been.
I started my family way later than you, though. Way later than most people; I’m 47 with three boys, the oldest is 6 (kids, don’t spend your twenties - sorry, your third and fourth 8 - smoking pot. It is a giant waste of time that you can’t get back), so I’m still in the fun family formation portion of having kids. But my friends with older kids are also happier than they’ve ever been. I suspect it just keeps getting better so long as you stay healthy.
I also turned 40 during the pandemic and it hit hard for me too. The bad news is that it really makes one ponder being on the other side of this lifespan and what to do with the time left.
The good news is the amount of F's that I have left to give about all the silly crap that kept me up at night has rapidly dwindled. It's deliciously freeing.
I hit 60 next month. Looking back at my 40s it was definitely a time of flux, but also of reflection: what I'd done and what I wanted to do. I can't say many of those plans came true. I planned to stay in this house until I couldn't get up the stairs, but we're being evicted in a few weeks. I planned to get back into work and kick M.E. So much for that!
What I can say, is that despite everything, I am happier and more relaxed than I have ever been. I still enjoy the thrashiest music, laughing my head off at crap TV, playing the PS4 and hanging out with my mates. I spoke to my Dad the other day, he's 91, and he says you don't really change the way you feel inside from about 40 onwards. The shell just ages. You look in the mirror and wonder who the old git is on the other side! He genuinely still gets out of bed excited about the day ahead, despite my Mum passing a while back.
I mean there are changes - your kids grow up and leave home, your teeth get a bit iffy and it's time to reach for the reading glasses more frequently, but inside, where it really matters you stay, to all intents and purposes, the same person.
Love your work, man. Always thought provoking. Enjoy the next 8 years. It'll be a blast!
I love this piece. So much of what you said about the different groups of 8 are really quite true. I'll be turning 56 in September. Within weeks I'll be moving and not sure where or even if I'll still be with my partner. And guess what he's been in my life for the last 8 years. See that 8 year grouping really does a repeat. I read your newsletter every time it appears in my email. So if it's not every week I'll just wait till it's in there again.
This was great - thanks!
And I think you’ve got it right - for the most part and for most people, things get better as you get older. I’m in my late 40s and happier than I’ve ever been.
I started my family way later than you, though. Way later than most people; I’m 47 with three boys, the oldest is 6 (kids, don’t spend your twenties - sorry, your third and fourth 8 - smoking pot. It is a giant waste of time that you can’t get back), so I’m still in the fun family formation portion of having kids. But my friends with older kids are also happier than they’ve ever been. I suspect it just keeps getting better so long as you stay healthy.
I also turned 40 during the pandemic and it hit hard for me too. The bad news is that it really makes one ponder being on the other side of this lifespan and what to do with the time left.
The good news is the amount of F's that I have left to give about all the silly crap that kept me up at night has rapidly dwindled. It's deliciously freeing.
Thanks Erik - this is lovely, and I think there’s much truth in it. Also, love that song by The National…