I wasn’t very good at it either. You’re right, life is life and sometimes life is hard. Sometimes you just have to get through the next hour or the next minute and it’s okay. Take care of you, drink plenty of water and believe tomorrow you’ll do better.
The very same thing happened to me around my 40th birthday. Two little kids at the time. It was an absolutely grim experience. The only upside was I lost 2 stone in weight grieving. It was as if she'd died, but worse than that, as I knew she was still around, but somewhere else, with someone else. So I absolutely feel for you.
But there is a happy ending: After seeing other women for a year or so I kind of gave up; my heart just wasn't in it. Then out of the blue she said shed like to meet. We'd both discovered that we had something that wasn't perfect but was more than the sum of our two parts. We got back together.
That was nearly 20 years ago - yeah, I'm an old git ;) To this day I don't know whether it was a midlife crisis, needing to try something new or not realising that what we had really was something special.
So don't give up. Give each other space to breathe, and who knows, you might both realise you already found what you were looking for.
That really sucks, so much. I hope you can find something even better with someone else one day. Don’t sweat the content - you’re allowed to have time to yourself to mourn the relationship and heal. Be kind to yourself. 🙂
I am so very sorry to hear this news. This is something that is just flat-out hard and painful….but you WILL come through the other side and you will be stronger. Take care of yourself. My thoughts are with you.
Erik, I have to say this makes me really sad. After following you for so long, I have seen many pictures of you both and this came as a real shock. I can only hope that you will be happier in the near future and that things go your way. Fortunately, you are a great writer and also Viking looking men are quite in fashion at the moment! Best of luck to you.
I came across your Boxes poem on FB a few minutes ago and now I’m here and while I’ve been following a long time I can’t believe I missed all this.
But then, looking at the dates, it coincides with major upheaval in my own life. Some major life shifts you see coming but you can’t seem to swerve out of the way and avoid them, others come out of nowhere and you’re left picking up the pieces but either way you’re learning how to steer again.
Anyway, I’m quite taken by your candidness. You write for a living. A lot of us follow you for your reviews and occasionally for the social commentary. But your openness regarding major events in your life - and I’ve noticed you write more about your children - I don’t know… it’s special. It’s real in a way that you don’t see too often. And a lot of people are writing about how they feel or what they are going through but it’s almost too much. It’s heavy handed. There’s an agenda, the need to over analyze (and I’m a Psych major returning for my counseling license), to make a statement and ground breaking commentary based on one’s experiences. Sometimes it feels manipulative.
I don’t get that from you. You’re to the point. The lived experience, the good and bad, it’s enough. I appreciate you letting us in. I hope you and your family are well and having a beautiful holiday season.
Good luck, man. It feels like the end of the world now, but it definitely isn’t. Not even close.
Since you opened up: can I ask why you two never got married?
Look after yourself mate. You’ll get through this.
I wasn’t very good at it either. You’re right, life is life and sometimes life is hard. Sometimes you just have to get through the next hour or the next minute and it’s okay. Take care of you, drink plenty of water and believe tomorrow you’ll do better.
It might take a while and be bumpy sometimes but you’ll get through it and be okay again.
Good luck, Eric. I have faith in you.
I am so very sorry for your situation and hope that things get better soon
The very same thing happened to me around my 40th birthday. Two little kids at the time. It was an absolutely grim experience. The only upside was I lost 2 stone in weight grieving. It was as if she'd died, but worse than that, as I knew she was still around, but somewhere else, with someone else. So I absolutely feel for you.
But there is a happy ending: After seeing other women for a year or so I kind of gave up; my heart just wasn't in it. Then out of the blue she said shed like to meet. We'd both discovered that we had something that wasn't perfect but was more than the sum of our two parts. We got back together.
That was nearly 20 years ago - yeah, I'm an old git ;) To this day I don't know whether it was a midlife crisis, needing to try something new or not realising that what we had really was something special.
So don't give up. Give each other space to breathe, and who knows, you might both realise you already found what you were looking for.
So sorry to hear, Erik. It sucks, but you sound like you're working through it, even if it doesn't feel like it.
That really sucks, so much. I hope you can find something even better with someone else one day. Don’t sweat the content - you’re allowed to have time to yourself to mourn the relationship and heal. Be kind to yourself. 🙂
I am so very sorry to hear this news. This is something that is just flat-out hard and painful….but you WILL come through the other side and you will be stronger. Take care of yourself. My thoughts are with you.
Sorry to hear that. As hard as it is right now, everything really will be okay. It just takes time.
I'm so sorry to hear this, I honestly wish you all the best, it's not easy you'll get through it
Erik, I have to say this makes me really sad. After following you for so long, I have seen many pictures of you both and this came as a real shock. I can only hope that you will be happier in the near future and that things go your way. Fortunately, you are a great writer and also Viking looking men are quite in fashion at the moment! Best of luck to you.
Sorry to hear you split. Can't imagine how you're feeling, but I know you'll persevere.
I came across your Boxes poem on FB a few minutes ago and now I’m here and while I’ve been following a long time I can’t believe I missed all this.
But then, looking at the dates, it coincides with major upheaval in my own life. Some major life shifts you see coming but you can’t seem to swerve out of the way and avoid them, others come out of nowhere and you’re left picking up the pieces but either way you’re learning how to steer again.
Anyway, I’m quite taken by your candidness. You write for a living. A lot of us follow you for your reviews and occasionally for the social commentary. But your openness regarding major events in your life - and I’ve noticed you write more about your children - I don’t know… it’s special. It’s real in a way that you don’t see too often. And a lot of people are writing about how they feel or what they are going through but it’s almost too much. It’s heavy handed. There’s an agenda, the need to over analyze (and I’m a Psych major returning for my counseling license), to make a statement and ground breaking commentary based on one’s experiences. Sometimes it feels manipulative.
I don’t get that from you. You’re to the point. The lived experience, the good and bad, it’s enough. I appreciate you letting us in. I hope you and your family are well and having a beautiful holiday season.
I hope things get better soon. :)